feeling their pain

On the night of June 22, 2002, I was in a hotel room in Hershey, PA, watching the James Bond movie "The Spy Who Loved Me" on a local network station, when during a commercial break I overheard something that shocked me.
On Thursday morning I was sitting in my living room when similar news shocked me again, though, in a sad way, not nearly as much.
I cannot begin to understand how the family of Nick Adenhart is feeling right now. I cannot understand the emotions of his Los Angeles Angels teammates, his friends, and others who knew him.
But I do know a bit about what the Angels' fans are feeling, for what it's worth.
June 22, 2002 was the day that St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Darryl Kile was found dead in his hotel room in Chicago, the victim of a heart attack, as the Cards were in town to face the rival Cubs. It was that news that a local TV anchor announced during that commercial break, and when I heard it, I wondered if I had heard correctly. It was unbelievable. I don't know if I breathed from that point until many minutes later when I turned over the ESPN to find out what I thought I heard was true.
As a Cardinals fan, I will never forget seeing the video at Wrigley Field that afternoon, as a packed house of both teams' fans waited wondering why the game was delayed. Then Cubs catcher Joe Girardi stepped to a microphone, and with tears in his eyes, delivered the message. I may not remember it exactly, but very close.
"We regret to inform you that due to a tragedy in the Cardinals family, today's game has been canceled."
I get tears in my eyes thinking about it seven years later. This was the arch-rival, or would have been on any other day. But on that day, it simply did not matter.
I relived the experience two years ago, when Cardinals reliever Josh Hancock was killed in a drunk driving accident in April, 2007. Hancock had been a member of the World Series winning team the year before.
Ironically, it was when the Cubs were in St. Louis for a series.
Of course, I didn't know either Kile or Hancock. I never met them. I don't believe I ever saw either of them play in person.
And yet, in both cases, I felt deeply saddened by their deaths, more than others you hear about on the news.
It is a strange business, being a sports fan. You become completely invested in the lives of people you have never met, or at least a small portion of their lives. You watch them on TV, day-in and day-out, and they become a part of your life as a result. They become important on some level.
And yet, when you get right down to it, you don't know anything about them.
Kile was a star, one of my favorite pitchers on the team, and a big part of the Cardinals resurgence as a franchise in the 2000s. Hancock was the epitome of a role player, a mediocre middle reliever known for eating up innings.
Kile had done nothing wrong. He simply had a heart problem that had gone undiagnosed. Hancock was the victim of his own foolish act, getting behind the wheel after too much drinking.
I felt the death of each pretty intensely. Tears welled in my eyes multiple times, and still do as I recall those moments.
Tears welled in my eyes once again this week for Adenhart. The 22-year-old had just pitched the best game of his young career, and showed tremendous promise. He was not guilty of anything. He simply went out, and another driver, with an impressive track record to put it one way, took away the lives of him and two of his friends (with another still in the hospital and possibly the next to go).
I won't spend any more time passing judgement. I won't spend any more time eulogizing the dead, whom I know nothing of personally. I won't try to offer condolences to the family, friends and teammates of Adenhart. It would only come up short of its mark even if they were to read this. That's not what I can offer.
In 2002 and 2007, I read the online message boards. I listened on the radio and on TV. I heard a nation of fans speak of how saddened they were by the deaths of Kile and Hancock.
Mostly, I heard the fans of other teams, particularly the Cubs, put aside trivial rivalries and reach out to those whom they would normally detest. It made a difference.
So if you speak to an Angels fan this week, and wonder why they are truly, deeply hurt on a very sincere and heartfelt level, offer condolences. I cannot explain it fully. I cannot understand it any better myself. But I know their pain.
I weep, this week, for them.

see you at the stadium

It's almost 4 in the morning, and I just got back from the gym. I recently joined a 24 hour gym (Cardio Express in Wethersfield if anybody's wondering) to suit my nocturnal lifestyle, and so far it's working out well. But that's not the point of this post.
I'll be covering my first game of the spring in less than 12 hours, and I'm very excited about it. I was stuck in the office most of the winter due to drastically early deadlines and our desire as a staff to continue to get results from as many games as possible in the paper. That meant I was on phone duty most nights. Now with games in the afternoon, I get to go back out in the field most days.
I'll be at the Berlin-New Britain border war baseball game at Beehive, and with a pair of good teams (one looking to be among the elite in the state) it should be exciting.
I figured now is a good time to share some of my "preseason" thoughts (the season is actually two days old) on the spring sports in the area.
Predicted top team: Berlin baseball
If anybody is going to win a state title this season, put your fake money on the Redcoats. They return a team loaded with talent. In fact, when contacted about previews, two opposing coaches had the same comment. "They're [expletive] loaded."
Think about it. Last summer both the Berlin Legion team and Jaycee-TD Banknorth League team made it to their championship, the latter winning. The teams both had players from the current high school squad, though the Legion team had more. This team returned most of its key parts, including a pitching staff coach Leo Veleas says is deeper in talent than he's ever coached. That's saying a lot.
Team on the rise: Newington softball
I have a feeling this could be a very special year for the Indians. They went 13-7 last year, losing a number of close games that they should have won. Experience is the greatest teacher, and with all six players back in front of the outfield grass (and in softball that's what matters most) the talent is there to be among the best in the CCC and possibly the state. Now, Masuk looks extremely tough to beat for a state title (and it's way to early to talk about that for this team), but the Indians held them scoreless in a 0-0 scrimmage. Keep an eye on this team.
Bounce-back year: Rocky Hill softball
The Terriers have had a few bad years and are looking back at the golden days when they had pitchers like Natalie Tine and Ashlee Teraila leading them deep in the state tournament. Well, look out for Megan Ruonavaara, a player who will terrify hitters in the coming years as much as her name terrifies sports writers. Rocky Hill is back.
Most likely to defend a title: Berlin boys golf
The Redcoats golfers will try to steal some attention away from the baseball team, and with Ryan Lee, Kevin Jud, Mike Scheyd and others back, this team has a very good shot to defend its Division II state title. Scheyd, typically their No. 3 guy, shot even par in his first round of the season. Not a bad way to start.
Best local athletes you've never watched: Farmington tennis players Mark Kahan and Monica Szwed
Kahan lost the state open final last year, but bounced back by winning the New England title instead. Szwed, as a sophomore, went deep in the girls tournament, and with a little added muscle to her precision shots should go further. These two are fun to watch, no punchers here. Of course, I speak as a varsity letter earner in tennis, so maybe I'm biased.
Best rivalry: It may be more media driven than anything (guilty as charged), or maybe not, but the three-way rivalry between golfers Sarah Sideranko (New Britain), Kirsten LaPointe (Newington) and Erica Barnes (Berlin) is always fun. Sideranko and LaPointe have been dueling it out in the spotlight since being named all-state players their freshman season. They have such contrasting styles of play on the course, it's fascinating to watch them head to head. Sideranko will invariably outdrive LaPointe, but the latter seems to know exactly where to hit it with the strength she has to make an approach shot possible.
Meanwhile, Barnes spent two years just trying to get noticed and did so in a big way by finishing tied for second at last year's state open, on a day when the other two weren't quite as sharp.
They all face off against each other, and to add to the fun, Sideranko and LaPointe will be college teammates at Hartford next season.
Some upperclassmen to watch (in no particular order): Spencer Parker, Newington volleyball; D.J. Voisine, Plainville baseball; Matt Carasiti, Berlin baseball; Chris Linares, New Britain baseball; Amanda Palmieri, Southington softball; Kelly Paterson, Southington softball; Felicia Leone, New Britain softball; Josh Edelson, Farmington golf; Chris Kelly, Southington track; Jackie English, Wethersfield softball
One other storyline: baseball dominance
I predict, for the second year in a row, that area baseball teams will finish much better than local softball teams. Looking around the towns, it's hard to find a bad baseball squad. Rocky Hill might be the weakest, but I have a feeling the Terriers will challenge people. Southington and Newington don't look as strong as they've been, but there's always talent at those two schools. I wouldn't be shocked if all these teams make the postseason, with Farmington appearing ready to bounce back this season, and teams like New Britain, Berlin, Plainville and Wethersfield possibly among the best.

That's about it for now. Come out to the Hive Friday at 3.

MLB season preview

OK. Spring is here. That means I will get out of the office and back into the field after a long winter which forced me to miss a lot of the action on the basketball court.
But, before we get to local high school stuff, I want to share my thoughts on the MLB season, and make my predictions for each team.
Now, as I did last year, I will make predictions on records for all the teams, but I will be doing this totally off the top of my head. The numbers will not add up to a possible outcome. But last season, I was relatively close on most teams, and actually quite proud of myself.
I am more excited than ever for baseball season. I think the birth of mlb.tv on the mlb.com Web site has allowed me to watch more baseball than ever, and I feel really well informed on the sport as a whole. So, with that in mind, expect my picks to be terrible. But here they are.

American League East
1. New York (95-67)- I've gone back and forth on this, and honestly, I think the top three teams in baseball are in this division. But one won't make the playoffs and another will need to win the wild card to get there. So, this is key.
The Yanks lineup is flawed, with Jeter getting old, Matsui not nearly what he used to be and Posada and Damon both reaching their final years. But, how can you beat the rotation with Sabathia, Burnett, Chamberlain, and Pettitte?
Well, the answer may be injuries, but until that happens, this is the team to beat if you ask me. They need A-Rod back desperately, but should be good when that happens. If they slip at all, they'll be caught.
2- Tie- Boston/Tampa Bay (94-68)- It's so close, let's just get a one-day playoff for the wild card. That would be fun.
The Sox's rotation looks stronger than expected. Penny is pitching well, and is healthy so far. Beckett, Daisuke and Lester are all very strong (again, if healthy. That seems to be a trend). Somebody will fill the last spot and at worst, Wakefield isn't a bad option.
The lineup post-Manny is still quite strong, though not as intimidating. Drew needs to get healthy, and I think Pedroia will come back just a bit from his MVP season. But I think Papi will pick up the slack.
As for the Rays, I can't figure out why David Price is starting the year in the minors, and if he weren't I'd probably have picked them ahead of New York. Bad move by the team if you ask me, because one or two games in the regular season could mean they don't get to October, so resting him could be a moot point.
But, this team still has a very strong rotation and bullpen from last year, Carl Crawford is poised for a big bounce-back year, and the rest of the team is young and improving. What's not to like?
4. Baltimore (75-87)- The rest of this division will suffer the consequences. The Orioles have some nice young pieces though, such as Adam Jones in center field. He's going to be a stud. The pitching staff has decent promise too, so I pick them barely ahead of the Jays.
5. Toronto (72-90)- I don't know why I'm quite so down on this team, but after Roy Halladay, I don't like much of what they have. Vernon Wells is getting old. Alex Rios is good, and Scott Rolen should do better than last year if he's healthier for once. But not much else.
I will be watching New Britain native Jesse Carlson closely as a reliever. His father is a great person and he's done well in his time so far.
American League Central
1. Minnesota (89-73)- Love the former Rock Cats in the rotation. And in a division with no great teams, consistency wins out. Nobody's staff is as balanced as the Twins, even if Scott Baker misses a bit of time at the start. But Denard Span needs to do better than he did in the spring and Mauer must get back healthy before too long. That could be a downfall.
2. Cleveland (85-77)- I could get laughed at for this, but I think this is a sleeper team. Here's why.
There's a lot of potential for surprise performances from the pitching staff. Cliff Lee and Fausto Carmona need to perform up to expectations. Jake Westbrook needs to return from Tommy John surgery healthy and before July. But there's hope behind that. I expect big things from Carl Pavano, getting out of New York, and Anthony Reyes, who has as much talent as anybody when he screws his head on correctly.
Plus, I like Victor Martinez to bounce back, Sizemore to improve and others to do well. I like this team. I could eat these words in September.
3. Chicago (82-78)- An up and down club headed for another "down" year. Good pieces. Alexei Ramirez is a rising star. But I expect dropoffs from Carlos Quentin, Jermaine Dye and the rotation.
4. Kansas City (78-82)- Much improved, but don't buy the hype that this team could contend in this division. The young pitching staff is solid, but the offense has no big bats to get the job done. Simply put, who's driving in the runs? Alex Gordon's not that good yet, and Coco Crisp is no savior.
5. Detroit (72-90)- Bad times ahead for the Motor City. This pitching staff, injured and declining in a hurry, is bad. The offense is weaker without Sheff and Pudge. Granderson, Magglio and Cabrera can't score enough to overcome the deficiencies. Horrible year.
American League West
1. Anaheim of LA in the Valley [or something like that] (90-72)- Smoke and mirrors, and good coaching, are enough to win this division. This isn't nearly as good a team as it used to be, and there are some early pitching questions. But in the end, who's beating them. Nobody else is very good. And Scioscia is one of the best in the game at getting the most out of a roster.
2. Oakland (84-78)- Still don't think this team is very good. This might even be a bit high for them. Holliday's numbers should plummet in the Coliseum. The pitching staff is mediocre. The rest of the lineup strikes out too much. But look for the return of Giambi, back to folk legend status by the Bay. He was never comfortable in New York.
3. Seattle (83-79)- The Mariners weren't a good team last year, but they weren't as bad as their record. Or at least shouldn't have been. Look for Bedard to do better this year, and the team to get a serious emotional boost from that Griffey guy. Some guys are just meant to be in certain cities. Junior never should have left. He belongs to Seattle.
4. Texas (80-82)- Teams still getting better, but there still isn't enough pitching to go with stud hitters like Kinsler and Hamilton.

National League East
1. New York (91-71)- I know the rotation depth is weak. I know you're counting a lot on John Maine and Oliver Perez to do well. But I believe in both of those guys and the Mets have found success at the front of games with mediocre talent in recent years. It's been the back end that's caused problems. Now they've got that settled with two top level guys in Putz and K-Rod.
Now, the runs that this lineup scores will hold up, and with Sheff added yesterday, the lineup looks even a bit stronger.
2. Philadelphia (89-73)- Here's where I see pitching problems. Hamels is hurt. Moyer is a human wonder, but can't do everything. Myers is never happy. What else is there. I saw Happ in person last year. He's not that good.
Great bullpen, great offense (even better with Utley back at full strength). But pitching will be the downfall for the champs.
3. Florida (86-76)- This is another sleeper team. Most in the division consider the Marlins rotation to be the best of the bunch, though almost completely unknown. Chris Volstad is the next guy to get recognized, the way Hamels has over the past three years. Hanley Ramirez is a star.
But overall, not enough depth in the lineup.
4. Atlanta (83-79)- This team could also sneak into the playoffs, if Francouer bounces back, Chipper stays healthy and other things go right. The rotation will have trouble staying healthy, even if it is good when the guys take the mound. So that will keep them back just a bit.
5. Washington (71-91)- You know, I think this team is much improved talent-wise. But the record won't get much of a boost playing four legitimately good teams in the division. Love Elijah Dukes. Love Dunn to get the fans excited. Don't expect to be in the race.

National League Central
1. Chicago (96-66)- Best team in the NL is back. They choked in the playoffs, but they're built for regular season greatness. Zambrano, Harden, Dempster (and Peavy?). That's tough to beat. The lineup is balanced and better with Milton Bradley. Let's see how they do when they get to the playoffs this time.
Only minor question for me is will Gregg and Marmol be as strong as Wood was last year. That could effect things.
2. St. Louis (93-69)- Homer pick. But seriously, I love my team this year.
STAT TIME!
Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright combined for 23 starts last year, going 11-4 (Carp was 0-1 and never got past the fifth inning). That team won 86 games.
Now those two are back healthy and should start, at a very conservative guess, 40 games at least. Thats good for five more wins. Add in an offensive upgrade at short, a plethora of outfield talent and a bullpen that will now be an asset as opposed to a detriment. Josh Kinney will be a great reliever, Ryan Franklin will be at home in the setup role and Jason Motte will close games out with pure power. Mark it down. This team makes the playoffs barring injuries.
3. Cincinnati (86-76)- Everybody's favorite to be this year's Rays looks good on paper. Volquez, Cueto, Harang, Arroyo and Owings in the rotation: good stuff. But...
After Joey Votto (who I love), Jay Bruce (who I like) and Brandon Phillips (who everybody should know more about) the offense is full of unproductive outs and little power. This offense can't score enough to take pressure off the young arms. That's a recipe for disaster.
4. Milwaukee (81-81)- Braun is awesome, and I hate him for that. Fielder is dangerous. Other guys can hit for power, though not as much for average.
But the team's best pitcher might be Jeff Suppan, three of the other starters are constantly hurt, and Braden Looper is a solid pitcher. That's not a lot of depth, and no ace. Remember, before CC got there last year, this team was not headed to the playoffs. He won't save them this year, and Sheets is gone, too.
5. Houston (74-88)- This is a team where the sum of the parts is greater than the whole. Somehow these guys won't blend. Good pitching performances will go wasted. Good offensive days will be ruined by poor starts. And Carlos Lee is so bad in left field it's worth about 20 runs over the course of the season to opponents. I like what they did adding Pudge, and Berkman's still the quietest great player in the game. But this team is destined to hit the skids.
6. Pittsburgh (66-96)- In contention to be the worst team in the league, if only San Diego weren't so bad it would be a landslide. They have a rotation of guys who could never live up to potential. Maholm, their best chance to break that chance, is pitching poorly in spring.
The offense is hideous and the defense even worse. Beautiful park. Ugly team.

National League West
1. Los Angeles (88-74)- I don't love any of these teams, and I've flip-flopped on this several times (like the AL East). But Manny is a difference maker and makes that offense the best in the division (not that that says much).
I don't like the pitching staff. There's too much riding on young guys, and guys who may have had career years last year. We'll see. This team still has the most upside in the division.
2. San Francisco (86-76)- Combine the Giants and Dodgers and you'd have a great team. Cause Lincecum, Cain and Randy Johnson is a fearsome top three in the rotation. But who will score the runs. The offense is better, but still bad. Nonetheless, I think this team fits its park very well and will post a very good home record.
3. Arizona (85-77)- This could change if a lot of the young hitters step up. Webb and Haren are still great, but the rest of the rotation isn't as good as before. But if Stephen Drew and whichever Upton is on this team reach their potential, that could go a long way. Plus I expect good things from Felipe Lopez at second, and Eric Byrnes could see a big bounceback year, if he ever gets to play.
4. Colorado (74-88)- Who's still on this team from the 07 World Series? Spillborghs. Tulowitzki. Ummmm???
Alright, Todd Helton's still there, but far too much of the team salary is tied up in an aging hitter with bad home and road splits. Pitching staff is suspect. Offense has noticeably less pop without Holliday.
5. San Diego (65-97)- Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. Look out 62 Mets. This team might challenge you, although that has proven harder and harder to do. Even the awful teams get some wins these days, and Jake Peavy's still a Padre for at least a couple months. Chris Young could bounce back and be a very good pitcher. And Brian Giles is... well, he's still there for what it's worth. (Adrian Gonzalez is one good offensive player this team has. He's about it.)
The offense is god awful. It's a shame that the owners' personal issues (divorce) are forcing the fans and team to suffer. Hang in there Pads fans.

Enjoy the season, fans. I know I will.
And stay classy, San Diego. It's going to be a loooooooong season.